Daily Archives: December 12, 2008

Bottom 3: Christmas Presents

If any gift is given with sincerity, then there is really no bad gift. But, there are times when I look back at a gift I’ve given and ask myself,”What was I thinking? That was a bad idea.”

Here is my list of the three worst Christmas gift.

#3. The Iron – I’m not talking about a great set of irons for that avid golfer in the family; I’m talking about the Rowenta that shows your wife what you are really thinking about at Christmas. The iron is representative of so many other items one could give, like a mop, a vacuum cleaner, or a new container of Tide concentrated laundry soap.

#2. The Chia Pet – “Makes a great gift!”. Yea, maybe for an aspiring young gardner who lives in a high rise apartment building. Seriously, are the clapper, chia pet, and garden weasel type items really purchased and given as gifts?

#1. The Reindeer Christmas Sweater – I think everyone gets a gift like this every year. It’s the gift that never gets worn out, but not because it’s durable; it’s because it never gets worn. It’s the special Christmas red or green sweater with a reindeer, a Santa, or snowman on the front. This gift is also represented by the Christmas tie, Christmas socks, Christmas mug, Christmas beanie, and Christmas underwear presents.

Remember, context is everything. So if Aunt Edna gives you a hand made sweater, she put a lot of time and effort into that gift. And if little Johnny picks out a cute gadget gift that really HE wanted, you have to receive that gift in the spirit it was intended, with love and thoughtfulness. And if your wife or mom give you a new pack of socks, maybe she’s trying to help you out because you’re a bum who will wear the same pair of socks until your toes pop through the front.


Filed under Bottom 3, family, humor