Category Archives: deep thought

Deep Thought

“I believe in making the world safe for children, but not our children’s children.  Because I don’t think children should be having sex.”

Jack Handey

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Deep Thought – 4/16/08

Instead of building newer and larger weapons of mass destruction, I think mankind should try to get more use out of the ones we have.

Jack Handey

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Deep Thought

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.

-Jack Handey

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Deep Thought – 4/2/08

Whether they live in an igloo or a grass shack or a mud hut, people around the world all want the same thing: a better house!

Jack Handey

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Deep Thought – 3/26/08

Broken promises don’t bother me. I just think,”Why did they believe me?”

Jack Handey

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Deep Thought – 3/19/08

“When I saw the bum pushing his grocery cart down the street, at first I felt sorry for him. But then when I saw what was in his cart I thought, well, no wonder you’re a bum, look at the dumb things you bought.”

-Jack Handey

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Deep Thought

“Sometimes, when you read a good book you actually feel like the author is right there with you. This is why I don’t like reading good books.”
Jack Handey

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Changes in pressure yield results

What do olive oil, beautiful music, diamonds, pearls, a muscled frame (like mine), a rocket, and great character have in common? You cannot have any of these things without pressure. The olive fruit is pressurized to extract the oil; our ears perceive the beautiful tones of music which are produced through various amounts of friction, pressure, and rhythm applied against the surface of a stretched skin, string, or through a valve; diamonds are formed from carbon under pressure over time; a pearl is produced when a clam or an oyster protects itself from an irritant like a piece of sand pressing against its flesh; muscles are attained by repetitively pressing against resistance; rockets are literally controlled explosions which funnel pressure greater than the force of gravity on the vessel being launched.

Your character is developed by your reaction to the pressures of life. You can be like the jellyfish and just go with the flow, or you can be the one who develops great muscles and makes beautiful music by pressing back.

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“I wish the day would hurry up!”

Have you ever said or thought,”I sure wish this day would hurry up and end,” or,”I wish the time would hurry up!”? I have been guilty of saying and thinking that many times. I never really thought about the consequences of my wish; I just wanted to go home from work, get out of a tough situation, go on vacation, or something along those lines. What was I really wishing? I was wishing that a part of my life would pass me by. Do you realize that your bad days, your tough times, your boring workday, and your times of sorrow are all part of your life as much as the rewards, the vacations, and all the good times? They may not always be enjoyable, but tough times are part of your existence. It reminds me of the movie Click. Yea, it’s a bit corny, but has a good principle. If you go around cutting out all the parts of your life that are not fun, or completely enjoyable, you wake up asking yourself where the time went. Besides, the bitter and sour only make the sweet taste sweeter.

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